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Just Killing Time?

Writer's picture: Kirby Clark, MMTKirby Clark, MMT

As a massage therapist, sometimes you have to read between the lines of what a client says and what they really mean. A part of active listening is repeating what you hear which allows the client to correct any mishearings or misunderstandings you have. Follow up and clarifying questions should also be asked when appropriate.

But what happens when a client doesn't have a vocabulary for what they are trying to communicate?

I recently had a client who responded (even after clarifying follow up questions) that their goal for the massage was, "to kill some time".


I should say that another part of providing care that is therapeutic is to communicate from a place of non-judgment. But I will admit that with this thoughtless absence of a goal, "to kill some time", I failed to hide my disappointment with this client's answer.


You have to want something!


And it's important to be able to identify and communicate your therapeutic goals.


You can't just be showing up, not wanting anything, no goals - like some kind of lunatic!


I could sense underneath it all that the client truly wanted to be there and clearly placed some positive value on massage therapy, even if their verbal comments would suggest otherwise. After all, there are far more cost effective ways to kill time!


But this non-goal oriented exchanged puzzled me and forced me to think critically.


Between the lines of what was said and what I'm assuming was meant- I believe what this client was asking (and what I might have coached the client to say) would be;


"My goal for today is to have time and space just held for me, with little-to-no expectations on me, a place where I can just be and not do."


And that is a perfectly fine and reasonable goal- therapeutic too!


In fact, it might be the most basic goal that massage therapy can easily provide for people.


Framing the client's goal as to "just kill time" isn't respectful of the therapist's time or skills. Nor is it respectful of a client's money or time. It's just NOT a therapeutic goal.


But to reorganize how the client thinks and speaks about this as just "having time and space focused on myself to be allowed to just be"?


That is a worthy therapeutic goal!




Peace and Healing,

Kirby Clark Ellis, MTI, BCTMB

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